The Healed Being program can be taken through email lessons every two to three days (Healed Being subscription) or purchased in full for access to all the lessons at once (Healed Being Online). You can choose the option that works best for you. 

If you purchase Healed Being Online, you’ll get immediate access to all the lessons, including existing and new Q&As as they’re released, lifetime access to the private online support and discussion groups, audio versions of the lessons, and more. 

If you choose the subscription, you can cancel anytime you’re ready to venture out on your own. 

For more information on both options, click here.

The subscription is designed to send you lessons at the most effective pace to give you time to apply and observe the changes, and also see how your healing affects those around you. 

Since the full Healed Being Online course gives you all the material at once, it’s important to choose a pace that works for you. Remember to give yourself time to apply what you’ve learned between lessons so that you can allow the changes to take place. 

Both options are effective and life-changing. Which one you choose will depend on how fast you need the lessons and how willing and ready you are to apply what you’ve learned to solve the challenges you’re facing. 

Both options give you access to the online support and discussion groups right away. That way, you’ll always have a place to get your questions answered. 

This is a true “cancel anytime” program. There is a Cancel Program link at the bottom of every lesson to make it easy. No hassle.

This is one of the most common questions I receive. The short answer is: If you’re looking to save your relationship after being emotionally abusive, this program will give you the best chance to make that happen. 

In my experience, when you’re truly committed to changing your behavior and healing any unhealthy coping mechanisms you may have, and you’re applying all the lessons, and they still have love in their heart for you, there is a good chance the relationship can be saved. 

The long answer, however, is much more complicated. As I said, it really depends if they still have love in their heart for you. Some people are just pushed too far over the edge, and there’s no coming back for them. When someone reaches their limit and they seal their heart shut, they usually aren’t willing to try any harder or travel any farther to reconnect with you. 

That’s not always the case, of course. Some are willing to unlock the seal they’ve put on their heart and let you in again. It all depends on your particular circumstances and just how far the hurtful behavior has gone.

Unfortunately, some people who join this program have already pushed someone they care about beyond their limit. It’s very difficult to reconcile after someone has closed their heart off completely. But again, as long as there is still love in there somewhere, there is a chance.

Everyone has their limits. And everyone is different in how they feel about reconnecting and making the relationship work. 

No matter what, always continue to work on yourself. Even if you know for sure you are losing the relationship today, you don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow or next year. You may reconcile with them or not. Or you may connect with someone new and you don’t want to lose that relationship either. 

Just focus on your own healing and growth to show up as the best version of yourself. 

Signing up for the trial of the program will give you a great start to your healing journey. It will also give you a good taste of the learning material and what to expect going forward.

I get a lot of feedback from those who are taking or have already gone through the program, so if you resonate with what they’re saying, you will likely benefit from Healed Being as well.

I encourage you to at least sign up for the free trial. If you aren’t sure if you should continue the program after that, sign up for the subscription for one month. That will give you a good measurement of the changes in your life.

If you don’t see the results you’re hoping to see, use the Cancel Program at the bottom of any lesson. You can stop anytime.

If, however, you find the program valuable, just continue the subscription or get all the lessons at once by purchasing Healed Being Online.

If you decide to purchase Healed Being Online, what you’ve paid into the subscription will be subtracted from the full price. Either way, you’ll start to see results that will improve many aspects of your life as soon as you begin.

Yes. It’s called Healed Being Online. Full details on that here. 

No. It’s very easy. At the bottom of every email you get from me, you’ll see a Cancel Program link. 

Honestly, I hate subscriptions that are hard to cancel, so you won’t get that here. You won’t get sent to a cancelation department. You won’t get anyone begging you to stay.

I trust you’ll know when it’s time to move forward on your own.

The Q&As are my responses to specific questions on relationships and behavior. These can be valuable lessons in themselves.  

Over the years, I’ve received a lot of questions regarding abusive and hurtful behavior. For each question I receive, I turn it into a Q&A lesson for everyone to benefit from.

I continue to get questions from both sides of emotionally abusive relationships and write up new Q&As all the time. As long as you’re on the subscription plan, you’ll continue to receive all the latest and best tools for your healing and learn techniques to help you change.

If you purchased the full Healed Being Online course, you will have access to all current and future Q&As for life, along with lifetime access to the online support and discussion groups. 

If you are physically abusive and you want to change that about yourself, I’m so glad you are willing to take the steps to do so. I’m sure you know just how much your life and relationships will change because of it. 

This is a complex topic, so I’ll do my best to address it below.

When a person who abuses, whether emotionally or physically, wants to stop the behaviors and heal the underlying issues, three important criteria have to exist:

1. They have to admit they have a problem (and believe it – not just say it because someone told them to)
2. They have to want to change and heal what makes them abusive in the first place
3. They have to step into humility and accept that they have been wrong about a lot of things (that’s usually the hardest part)

Numbers 1 and 2 make sense. Number 3, however, can throw a lot of people off.

For me, number 3 was about learning that relationships weren’t about controlling the other person but about letting go of control. That was so hard! It was probably the hardest step to take on my healing journey because I believed if I couldn’t control the people around me, I thought for sure that I’d either be hurt or unhappy or both.

No matter what, I didn’t want to feel that way, so I made sure to stay in control so that my discomfort or unhappiness would never occur. That meant staying abusive.

Controlling takes many forms. It can be covert manipulations, subtle or overt guilting, and making the other person feel they are the problem.

It can happen by belittling and invalidating another person to keep them focused on constantly trying to fix themselves instead of admitting you need to “fix” yourself.

And controlling can also extend into physical abuse, where you believe the way to avoid discomfort and unhappiness is by physically overpowering another person so that they must comply with what you want them to do.

The physical abuse part is usually where the line is drawn for most people in a relationship. Emotional abuse is often hard to identify as it comes in many ways. But physical abuse is obvious, making the victim of that type of abuse have no doubt they are in a dangerous situation.

Both types of abuse are dangerous:

Emotional abuse can alter another person’s perceptions and beliefs, slowly chipping away at who they are so that they eventually can’t recognize themselves anymore.

Physical abuse (which is almost always an extension of the emotional abuse already taking place) will pile on physical pain and genuine fear so that the victim feels as if they have no choice but to submit and do exactly what the abuser wants them to do or feel the immediate consequences of their non-compliance.

And, of course, this doesn’t even address the life-threatening situation many physical abuse victims are in. One push, smack, kick, or punch could disable or kill another person, even when that wasn’t the intention of the abuser. And because of that, it is often why I and probably every other professional in this area will advise victims of physical abuse to make a plan to leave a situation like that.

The Healed Being program addresses the origins of your emotional triggers – the upset under the behaviors. It helps you understand exactly what you’re doing that leads to abuse and gives you the tools to show up differently.

Physical abuse stems from emotional abuse. This program focuses on emotional abuse and will, therefore, be helpful to the physical abuser as well.

However, you will also want to contact a therapist or other professional who works in domestic violence or anger management so that you can address your physically abusive behaviors while working on the mental and emotional stuff.

Physical abuse can also involve knee-jerk fight-or-flight reactions, causing you to become physically harmful to others. This means that even though you will find methods of regulating your emotional state through Healed Being, those knee-jerk responses that lead to physically abusive behaviors can still be waiting on the sidelines, ready to flare up at any moment. That’s why working one-on-one with a professional in conjunction with this program is recommended and will be the most beneficial to you.

Healed Being will help you work through and identify triggers, understand patterns, and develop new ways of responding to challenging situations (coping skills). And when you’ve started healing those things, physically abusive behaviors are less likely to occur.

I’ve had physical abusers in the program. They gained a lot from what I teach and have even stopped all of their abusive behaviors.

I look at all abuse this way:

It is the end result of a chain of events preceding it. You experience something that triggers you (the stimulus), you have thoughts and feelings about it (internal processing), then you react by hurting another person (abusive behavior).

By working on why the stimulus bothers you and how to change your internal processing, you can alter your reaction. That’s the ultimate goal, at least. Your reaction could be emotional or physical, so any work you do on the stimulus and the internal processing is going to be helpful.

Will this program work for the physical abuser?

It will help as it addresses the origins of the abusive behaviors.

Will it stop you from being physically abusive?

It may, but only a professional can assess and make that determination. Using this program in conjunction with one is advised.

What’s the most important thing that needs to be present when trying to stop being physically abusive?

You have to want to stop so bad that you’re willing to suffer discomfort and get results you don’t want. In other words, your healing and change become priorities over your fear of what might happen if you let go of control.

What does that mean? It means abusers don’t want to be unhappy or uncomfortable, as I said earlier. And stopping abusive behaviors means that you have to accept that you will very likely be unhappy and uncomfortable as you go through this process.

What you may not realize, however, is that when you stop the controlling and abusive behaviors, the unhappiness and discomfort you believe will happen will very likely never happen at all.

The fear of what could happen is what keeps people abusive. If you weren’t afraid of what might happen if you let go of controlling another person, do you think you’d be abusive? It’s a question to reflect on.

There’s a lot more on that topic in the program, but I wanted to give you something to think about as you make the decision to join or not. At a minimum, when you sign up for the free lessons, you’ll learn very quickly if you resonate with what I teach. If you do, then you’ll know the rest of the lessons will be valuable to you.

No matter what, never stop pursuing healing from this.

The Healed Being program can be taken through email lessons every two to three days (Healed Being subscription) or purchased in full for access to all the lessons at once (Healed Being Online). You can choose the option that works best for you. 

If you purchase Healed Being Online, you’ll get immediate access to all the lessons, including existing and new Q&As as they’re released, lifetime access to the private online support and discussion groups, audio versions of the lessons, and more. 

If you choose the subscription, you can cancel anytime you’re ready to venture out on your own. 

For more information on both options, click here.

The subscription is designed to send you lessons at the most effective pace to give you time to apply and observe the changes, and also see how your healing affects those around you. 

Since the full Healed Being Online course gives you all the material at once, it’s important to choose a pace that works for you. Remember to give yourself time to apply what you’ve learned between lessons so that you can allow the changes to take place. 

Both options are effective and life-changing. Which one you choose will depend on how fast you need the lessons and how willing and ready you are to apply what you’ve learned to solve the challenges you’re facing. 

Both options give you access to the online support and discussion groups right away. That way, you’ll always have a place to get your questions answered. 

This is a true “cancel anytime” program. There is a Cancel Program link at the bottom of every lesson to make it easy. No hassle.

The subscription is the best option for those who need to watch their budget. 

However, even though Healed Being is a powerful, life-changing experience and a much smaller investment than therapy, the program is still out of reach for some people. That’s why I host two free podcasts dedicated to your mental health and well-being.

My shows:

The Overwhelmed Brain

This podcast will help you make good decisions, become emotionally intelligent, and create great relationships. It’s all about what it takes to become the most improved version of yourself.

Love and Abuse

This podcast talks about emotionally abusive relationships and learning how to deal with abusive behavior from others. It is geared toward the recipient of hurtful behavior, but I have many episodes that I give the perpetrator of those behaviors helpful guidance as well. 

Love and Abuse can be extremely valuable along your journey to healing not only because you may relate to many of the topics I talk about, but you’ll also get the perspective of the victim of emotional abuse – a valuable viewpoint that can help you empathize and understand at a greater depth. 

Also, there are times people who take this program reach out to me and share that they are the victims of emotional abuse, and they didn’t realize it. Sometimes the victims are made to believe they are the perpetrators. It’s good to learn just where you fit in so that you know what to work on. 

Not at this time. However, I and others are available in the online groups for you when you need to vent, ask questions, or simply share what’s going on in your life.

I make sure to reply to every single post, so you’ll always have my insights and opinions on what you’re going through. We are all there to help you through the challenges you’re facing. And it can be helpful to be in a place where there are people that can relate to what you’re going through.

Absolutely. Feel free to reach out anytime. Here’s my contact form.